It’s been a while since I’ve really blogged. And I have to admit that I’m still learning what it means to be a blogger. To me, I’m just a writer. I’m not a blogger, yet. I wann’a be though… One day, I will be; I’ll have a lot more to say… Especially with all that I’ve been going through lately… which is why I’m here right now.
For the past few weeks (maybe months, I don’t keep count) I’ve been exhausted (mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually) to the point I haven’t wanted to get out of bed… but I’ve forced myself to do so and go to work, even when/if I wasn’t feeling my best.
I strive so hard though, because I have to. I don’t have any other option, honestly. But still, so much goes on in my head on a daily basis. Stuff that I don’t know how to talk about sometimes… or I do, except the only way I can get it out is through rapping… I find myself speaking my mind a lot through writing lyrics lately instead of just sitting and talking to people. Part of it’s got to do with the social anxiety. But if I’m not writing lyrics, pouring my heart out in that way, then I’m not really talking or being raw (as honest as I could be).
With all that being said, I am now inviting you to come along with me on this journey as I rap to you… You might be able to relate to these verses that I’ve piled up and kept to myself.
Here’s the first verse I would like to share, it’s called “Confession”:
I must confess; sometimes I’m not as strong as some people think/ I can be weak, I get depressed, I fall apart and I sink/ It’s just that Jesus’ always there to get me back on my feet/ But I promise bleed like you, and if you cut me, you’ll see//
Sometimes I wish that I was stronger, bolder; I just wann’a be a soldier/ But I get hurt and climb aboard my emotional roller coaster/ Yeah, I’m a man, but I still cry… I used to hold it all inside/ I was angry, foolish, filled with pride – you’d never catch me wipe my eyes//
But I’m done with that, no holding back – I’m moving forward, forget the past/ And I may seem whack; I’m cool with that – but I had to find a better path/ As I write I go into a place where I know I don’t have to hide/ I just get this feeling, like I’m cruising – let the windows down and ride//
My life ain’t easy, but it makes me meek… Jesus is who’s keeping me/ The only way I sleep at night; because He is the Prince of peace/ I face struggles every day, and I got friends who’ll say the same/ But we’ve overcome so much through Christ; we know that He forever reigns//
If you want to talk to me or share your opinion about the verses I put up, feel free! I would love to talk with you. Welcome to my journey… Come; walk with me.